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Loquillo
Published in: Articulos

En mi Navidad

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Cuando las luces de Navidad toman las calles un sentimiento contradictorio me sacude como un disparo en la cabeza, me pregunto, que pinto yo, una vez más en medio de todo esto.

Dejando a un lado el ritual judeocristianocalvinista que nos toca vivir durante estos días de dulce horror, caigo, seguro que no soy el único, en el inevitable flahsbach sobre mi navidad.

Yo sé que mi infancia fue maravillosa, que no teníamos nada. Un pequeño árbol de plástico y el pesebre montado sobre la máquina de coser de mi madre. Cuando papá traía algo de contrabando de los muelles donde se dejaba la espalda, nos tocaba el gordo de Navidad o eso parecía.

En mi adolescencia me lo tomaba como una buena excusa para dejar la disciplina académica. Cuando la disciplina académica me dejó a mí ya no era consciente de las fechas del año porque me dedicaba a vivir y la Navidad era un trámite más hacia el final de mi juventud.

Soy de una generación de adultos tardíos… Ya digo, mi infancia fue maravillosa.

 

Sobre el terremoto que sientes al darte cuenta que la fiesta ha terminado y tienes treintaitantos merece una mirada documental a lo National Geographic. Si te recuperas de ello y te enfrentas por fin al mundo adulto, la Navidad se convierte en la estación del año y digo bien estación, porque cada vez dura más,  que mas detestas, tus padres están mayores o acaban de irse,  pasas lista de los amigos muertos, de los guiones nunca escritos, las adicciones privadas, los amores prohibidos, los ideales abandonados, el mundo que conocimos, de la Europa que ganamos y hasta de la España que perdimos y haces una semblanza patética de un tiempo que parece que se te escapó de las manos. De lo que has vivido y empiezas a pensar que no vivirás.

A partir de los cuarenta las hostias vienen todas seguidas, las respuestas a las preguntas existenciales no existen y te asustas al pensar que ya no es lo que viene sino lo que te queda.

Ante un panorama tan alentador solo te queda beber la  cicuta navideña.  En un extraño giro del destino te ves jugando con un niño como el que tú fuiste en el salón de casa intentando montar con dificultad un jodido barco de Peter Pan ante la mirada de tu hijo que piensa que eres un tonto a las 3.

 

Y te reencuentras con tu infancia, las imágenes de tu padre sonriendo, de tu madre diciendo que te acabes la sopa que si no te la acabas no vindran els Reis…la carrera de las uvas, la tele en blanco y negro, las luces de ciudad, la cabalgata de reyes… ¿Pero quien es ese Santa Claus? Y piensas entonces que la vida no es más que eso, reciclarse o morir. Y ya no eres el hijo, ahora eres el padre.

 

Así que con vuestro permiso le doy la vuelta al disco que interpretan Bing Crosby y Frank Sinatra para recibir a mi familia de hoy, beberemos vino y comeremos brontosaurio y cuando mi hijo adolescente se vaya a explorar las calles, (porque eso también llega) me sentare en el sofá con una copa de cava y veré mi película favorita, protagonizada por mi madre Donna Reed y mi padre James Stewart. Declaración de principios y valores humanos de ayer y hoy que es la grandiosa “Que Bello es Vivir” y cuanto nos conviene revisitarla hoy más que nunca, como lección de ciudadanía. En estos tiempos de delirante navidad, a veces el pasado solapa al presente y te hace reaccionar. Para mí, cada vez que la veo es un chute de coraje del que salgo nuevo.

Cada cual tiene sus rituales navideños, sopa de galets,  mazapán, cotillones religiosos, furor por el consumo de papel de regalo. Mi navidad tiene nombre y apellido, el cine son Los Reyes Magos y papa Noel Frank Capra.

Leave a comment

  1. Es cierto que cuando llegamos a los 50 e incluso mucho antes,la navidad hace años que dejó de ser una fiesta, una ilusión. Sólo si has tenido niños vuelves a esa esa niñez gracias a ellos, y no me importa, que al menos unos días al año, vuelva a ser un niño, a disfrutar unos días con ellos hasta que se hagan adultos y pierdan la ilusión. Por ello pienso que la navidad es el momento en que todos volvemos a ser niños, que la infancia es una época maravillosa y también se acaba. Si pensáramos como niños, otro mundo tendríamos. Felices fiestas.

  2. Feliz Navidad Loco!!!!!!!! 🙂

  3. AMEN….AL DESTINO QUE ME ENGAÑA, AMEN A LOS SOLAS Y SOLOS DE ESTOS TIEMPOS QUE CORREN…AMEN NAVIDAD AMEN…NO CREO EN TI NAVIDAD CREO EN LOS OJOS DE LOS NIÑOS QUE LA VIVEN CON ILUSION….ILUSION QUE TALVEZ LOS PADRES NO SABEN ALIMENTAR….Y QUE LA MULTINACIONAL LLMADA PAPA NOEL SI LES PUEDE DAR….

  4. volver a ser un niño, eso decía urquijo, y el mejor arte y ensayo es teniendo un hijo y te hace volver a ser un niño…con eso mucha salud para todos y muchos hij@s para tod@s.

  5. No creo que seas tu, Loco, el que escribe este «articulo». Todos hemos perdido gente en el camino. En mi caso mis padres, los dos muy jóvenes a mi entender. Desde entonces para mi la Navidad ha perdido todo sentido, pero soy padre como tu, aunque mis hijos todavía tienen 8,7 y 6 años. Es por ellos que hay que intentar que la Navidad sea algo especial, un tiempo de magia. Es verdad que cuando pierdes a tus orígenes , a tu punta de lanza, a tu ejemplo, a tus referentes; al fin y al cabo a tu pilar principal de la familia , todo se desvanece. Pero la Navidad es un tiempo de encuentro con familiares , amigos , un tiempo de magia, un tiempo feliz. Tiempo de disfrutar de la familia que aún nos queda , y días de llorar al abrazo de tu hermano recordando a quién no esta , pero con felicidad, recordando los buenos momentos que pasamos, aunque igual los peores son más , pero siempre hay que recordar los mejores.
    A todos os pido , disfrutad de la Navidad que la vida es muy corta y no vale la pena estar siempre en contra de todo . No os carguéis la Navidad que aunque se algo hipócrita a todos nos alegra.
    Salud

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